Dating site are meant to meet people, but not for the purpose of expanding your business. Mr. Coffee actually contacted me while I was out on a bad date with Metal Man. From his alias, you can guess he asked me out to grab coffee. I contacted him back to let him know I was out for the evening but could we meet another day? All was well and we agreed to meet a couple days later at a local health grocery shop for coffee and tea.
I arrived and quickly learned that this was not an opportunity to get to know each other for the sake of dating but rather for him to scope out possible new business. You see.....he is a personal trainer. And I do talk about my workout regime on my profile. And I am not a tiny, skinny woman either. I guess he figured he could "fix" me while making money? Uhm....no.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
All Sorts Of No!
It's a good thing that my first dating experience (after a long drought) with Mr. Man was such a positive one. Had THIS guy been the first one, I probably would've turned tail and ran back into a corner never to appear again. We shall this guy, Metal Man.
Metal Man and I talked for probably close to 2 weeks before going out. He was interested in a baseball game (local minor league team) I was attending but didn't really know the game. So we agreed to go together and I would teach him the game. Over the course of the 10 days, he was very smooth. Used all the cheesiest pickup lines that made me laugh (I am a sucker for cheesy pickup lines!) and in general was very interesting to chat with. And in typical Angela fashion, I really didn't think my day through before the date. You see, I was attempting my first 5K run right before the game. I literally had 15 minutes to get presentable for our date.
So here I was in a bathroom by my office (the company sponsored me in the run) stressing out over the fact that I could NOT STOP SWEATING. I was covered, every inch of me was covered. I got dressed and used the cool setting on my hair dryer to dry up my hair and cool my body off. It worked! I quickly fixed my face and made sure that I was looking hot and confident despite being nervous.
I walked out and there he was. And he didn't look like his pictures that I had seen. He probably hadn't looked like his pictures in 10 years! Let's just say that he looked less appealing that his pictures but me wanting to give him the opportunity to be his sweet self, ignored this. I like to be physically attracted but sometimes brains and sense of humor really do make someone look more attractive than that initial appearance. I went in for the hug....I hug all the guys I meet....and the smell hit me. I swear he had not showered in 2 days. Here's the thing, his profession is not hard labor. But I thought that maybe he picked up some side work and had worked all day. If that were the case, I could be okay with the smell and so I was going to find out. Next he handed me a lavendar rose. Very smooth because he was the first guy to give me a flower on the first date.
So we left and went to the game. In the course of discussion I did in fact learn that he had not worked since 11 am that day. This really ticked me off. Here I was stressing about me being sweaty and gross, with only 15 min to get ready.......and this guy had 6 hours in which he could've showered! Am I really not worthy of a shower? I also learned that he lived downtown (he walked to our meetup spot and I drove us to the game). This means one of two things, he is either loaded with money or he is homeless. There is no inbetween because of the expense it takes to maintain a home in the downtown area. I became very suspicious. So when the game ended, I decided to cut the date short. I knew he wanted to move on to a bar somewhere but I was legit tired and really......he wasn't getting another date out of me. So when we got in the car I said "I am so tired, I guess I will drop you off at your place and we can chat later?". Sheer panic spread across his face. Then he said "Well, no matter what happens tonight...I have to go to the store." No matter what happens? What in the flying fuck does he think is going to happen????? So I said "So you want me to drop you off at the store" and he replied that it would be great. So I did. That's when I knew. He is homeless.
I went home and immediately blocked him. No. No no no no no no. I can date guys who don't have a lot of money and are creative with dates. I can date guys who work at McDonalds or is a mechanic or whatever. I can't date guys who are homeless, who are insecure about their jobs, or assume that somehow I am too good for them (seriously, be confident!! If I am talking to you, I have deemed you worthy). So this guy is a big fat no. He needs to get his life in order before dating.
The upside? I came home and had a message from someone else about having a coffee date. On to the next!
Metal Man and I talked for probably close to 2 weeks before going out. He was interested in a baseball game (local minor league team) I was attending but didn't really know the game. So we agreed to go together and I would teach him the game. Over the course of the 10 days, he was very smooth. Used all the cheesiest pickup lines that made me laugh (I am a sucker for cheesy pickup lines!) and in general was very interesting to chat with. And in typical Angela fashion, I really didn't think my day through before the date. You see, I was attempting my first 5K run right before the game. I literally had 15 minutes to get presentable for our date.
So here I was in a bathroom by my office (the company sponsored me in the run) stressing out over the fact that I could NOT STOP SWEATING. I was covered, every inch of me was covered. I got dressed and used the cool setting on my hair dryer to dry up my hair and cool my body off. It worked! I quickly fixed my face and made sure that I was looking hot and confident despite being nervous.
I walked out and there he was. And he didn't look like his pictures that I had seen. He probably hadn't looked like his pictures in 10 years! Let's just say that he looked less appealing that his pictures but me wanting to give him the opportunity to be his sweet self, ignored this. I like to be physically attracted but sometimes brains and sense of humor really do make someone look more attractive than that initial appearance. I went in for the hug....I hug all the guys I meet....and the smell hit me. I swear he had not showered in 2 days. Here's the thing, his profession is not hard labor. But I thought that maybe he picked up some side work and had worked all day. If that were the case, I could be okay with the smell and so I was going to find out. Next he handed me a lavendar rose. Very smooth because he was the first guy to give me a flower on the first date.
So we left and went to the game. In the course of discussion I did in fact learn that he had not worked since 11 am that day. This really ticked me off. Here I was stressing about me being sweaty and gross, with only 15 min to get ready.......and this guy had 6 hours in which he could've showered! Am I really not worthy of a shower? I also learned that he lived downtown (he walked to our meetup spot and I drove us to the game). This means one of two things, he is either loaded with money or he is homeless. There is no inbetween because of the expense it takes to maintain a home in the downtown area. I became very suspicious. So when the game ended, I decided to cut the date short. I knew he wanted to move on to a bar somewhere but I was legit tired and really......he wasn't getting another date out of me. So when we got in the car I said "I am so tired, I guess I will drop you off at your place and we can chat later?". Sheer panic spread across his face. Then he said "Well, no matter what happens tonight...I have to go to the store." No matter what happens? What in the flying fuck does he think is going to happen????? So I said "So you want me to drop you off at the store" and he replied that it would be great. So I did. That's when I knew. He is homeless.
I went home and immediately blocked him. No. No no no no no no. I can date guys who don't have a lot of money and are creative with dates. I can date guys who work at McDonalds or is a mechanic or whatever. I can't date guys who are homeless, who are insecure about their jobs, or assume that somehow I am too good for them (seriously, be confident!! If I am talking to you, I have deemed you worthy). So this guy is a big fat no. He needs to get his life in order before dating.
The upside? I came home and had a message from someone else about having a coffee date. On to the next!
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
What On Earth?
Dear 75brett,
It's not your business what my genitals look like unless we happen to be in a situation in which sexy times are about to take place. Obviously we were not in the throws of sexy times. This, 75brett, is why you are single (if you aren't a committed/married douchebag looking to cheat on his SO!). You aren't deserving of a decent time with any self-respecting woman. "Looking to chat and see where it goes".....so how did that brick wall feel when you slammed into it?
Tuesday, June 10, 2014
The First One
I started seeing someone several months ago, we shall call him Mr. Man. He was good for me. Gave me the confidence I needed to be able to have a good experience to know for sure what I wanted out of dating and know that I am worthy of a decent time. In this respect, dating is MUCH easier this time around because I have self esteem that I didn't have in my 20's.
Let me say that I like Mr. Man. I could see a healthy serious relationship growing from it. But in that respect, it scares me. I am coming out of a very bad relationship that I was in for 17 years. One that belittled and disrespected me at every chance. Because of that, I don't want a commitment let alone get close to the possibility of marriage. As a result, I have never told Mr. Man how I really feel about him. I am not good with expressing those types of feelings anyway. I have a very long track record of having those feelings used against me and I don't want yet another opportunity for someone to abuse me. NOT to say that Mr. Man would. But I am still in that mode that he is a potential individual to do that. And because I do like him, it would hurt more. However, because I haven't told Mr. Man how I feel he has now pulled back from me. We haven't seen each other in quite some time yet we still occasionally talk. If there is a chance to hang out, I will probably accept that. But it doesn't look as if there will be any casual dating with him at this time. And I am completely okay with that.
Let me say that I like Mr. Man. I could see a healthy serious relationship growing from it. But in that respect, it scares me. I am coming out of a very bad relationship that I was in for 17 years. One that belittled and disrespected me at every chance. Because of that, I don't want a commitment let alone get close to the possibility of marriage. As a result, I have never told Mr. Man how I really feel about him. I am not good with expressing those types of feelings anyway. I have a very long track record of having those feelings used against me and I don't want yet another opportunity for someone to abuse me. NOT to say that Mr. Man would. But I am still in that mode that he is a potential individual to do that. And because I do like him, it would hurt more. However, because I haven't told Mr. Man how I feel he has now pulled back from me. We haven't seen each other in quite some time yet we still occasionally talk. If there is a chance to hang out, I will probably accept that. But it doesn't look as if there will be any casual dating with him at this time. And I am completely okay with that.
Friday, June 6, 2014
Hi There! Nice To Meet You
It was recommended that I start this blog because of the things I talked about with girlfriends in regards to my new status as single and available. Why? Because I am 38 years old, I have 3 kids, and I am still in the process of a divorce (and my lawyer let me know I am free to date!). What I want and what others want really don't match and so thus began the idea of journalizing my dating endeavors.
I am currently on PlentyOfFish.com and OkCupid. Online dating is perfect for me. I am not much for friends setting me up and the number of guys I meet in my regular life are next to none. I can only think of one guy who works in my building that I would really want to date (and oh em gee is he hot!). So, online dating exposes me to lots of new options. Of course you find your creepers and a few that you wonder what made them think you would be interested. Like the guy who wanted to know if the "carpets matched the drapes". I mean....really??? Do guys really think that they should ask that question?
The other great thing about online dating is that the rejection really doesn't hurt. I send a message and the guy doesn't respond? Whatever....I have probably contacted 5 different people that day. He responds with "thanks but not interested"? His loss! Yes there is an element of it being impersonal but that keeps the ego from being squished into a million tiny pieces.
So what am I looking for? Simply put, casual dating without expectations of a commitment. I don't like this idea of going out with a guy and then an expectation that I will ONLY date that guy for however long it lasts. Nope, I want a date for every free night I have if at all possible. Sex? Yea, it could happen. It might not. As long as I am enjoying the company, it's all good. And that is the thing, I want to enjoy someone's company. If there is a physical attraction that is an added plus.
But what about the question of who pays for what? Well, when I go out.....I bring cash. Sure, I'd like for the guy to pay for everything. But I will make the offer to pay my way or to pick up the tab the next time we go out. I don't really expect them to pay my way however.
So join me as this old chick wades through the world of Internet Dating when she hasn't dated in a good 20 years. It's a strange feeling but really.....quite the adventure!
I am currently on PlentyOfFish.com and OkCupid. Online dating is perfect for me. I am not much for friends setting me up and the number of guys I meet in my regular life are next to none. I can only think of one guy who works in my building that I would really want to date (and oh em gee is he hot!). So, online dating exposes me to lots of new options. Of course you find your creepers and a few that you wonder what made them think you would be interested. Like the guy who wanted to know if the "carpets matched the drapes". I mean....really??? Do guys really think that they should ask that question?
The other great thing about online dating is that the rejection really doesn't hurt. I send a message and the guy doesn't respond? Whatever....I have probably contacted 5 different people that day. He responds with "thanks but not interested"? His loss! Yes there is an element of it being impersonal but that keeps the ego from being squished into a million tiny pieces.
So what am I looking for? Simply put, casual dating without expectations of a commitment. I don't like this idea of going out with a guy and then an expectation that I will ONLY date that guy for however long it lasts. Nope, I want a date for every free night I have if at all possible. Sex? Yea, it could happen. It might not. As long as I am enjoying the company, it's all good. And that is the thing, I want to enjoy someone's company. If there is a physical attraction that is an added plus.
But what about the question of who pays for what? Well, when I go out.....I bring cash. Sure, I'd like for the guy to pay for everything. But I will make the offer to pay my way or to pick up the tab the next time we go out. I don't really expect them to pay my way however.
So join me as this old chick wades through the world of Internet Dating when she hasn't dated in a good 20 years. It's a strange feeling but really.....quite the adventure!
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